Fisherman’s Lure

If there’s any dish that represents the history and heritage of San Francisco, it’s cioppino. Even more so than the storied loaves of sourdough bread produced in droves around the bay, this humble yet simultaneously opulent dish has sustained generations. Tomatoes and seafood meet in an herbaceous broth spiked with white wine, embodying elegance without ostentation. It’s the working person’s humble indulgence, paying homage to the bounty of the region. The lack of plant-based seafood options put me off of attempting to replicate it for far too long. It turns out, nature already has a fantastic alternative to offer: mushrooms.

Mushrooms: The New Seafood

Yes, of course mushrooms! Varieties like king oyster mushrooms, maitake (AKA, hen of the woods), and shiitake, all featured prominently in this rich brew, make excellent seafood alternatives for a few key reasons:

  • Texture: Mushrooms have a naturally meaty and chewy texture, especially the small, thick caps of Donko Sugimoto Shiitake, evocative of scallops or shrimp when cooked.
  • Umami: Mushrooms, particularly dried shiitake, are rich in umami, which is also a crucial tasting note found in seafood. This depth of flavor comes from compounds like glutamate, inosinate, and guanylate, which are the uniquely potent trio that Sugimoto Shiitake brings to the table.
  • Absorbency: Mushrooms are known for their ability to absorb and enhance the flavors of whatever they are cooked with. When seasoned with seafood-like ingredients (such as seaweed, lemon, garlic, and herbs), mushrooms can take on flavors that mimic those of the sea.
  • Nutrition: While mushrooms don’t provide the same exact nutritional profile as seafood, they do offer important nutrients, including protein, fiber, and various vitamins and minerals.

Chip In For Cioppino

Legend has it that fishermen of yore would all “chip in” a bit of the day’s catch to make a communal vat of stew to share, and if you can imagine that with an Italian accent, the origin of the name would be clear. Others, however, see a more concrete link through the Italian word “ciuppin,” which means “to make soup from fish” or “little soup” in Ligurian dialect. In either case, it illustrates the beauty of this dish, which is infinitely adaptable. Built upon whatever was available at the end of a hard day’s work, there are no hard and fast rules. Had those founding San Franciscans set off into the forests instead of the sea, I’m confident there would be more foraged finds, like earthy wild mushrooms, added to the pot.

Cook Quickly, Savor Slowly

Romantic as the ideas of soup simmering on the stove may be, rarely do I have the time to babysit an all-day affair like that. Instead, I’m coming in hot with a quick-fix approach, taking advantage of my trusty pressure cooker. After sautéing the aromatics, it only takes 10 minutes under pressure to yield buttery-soft mushrooms and meltingly tender vegetables. Should you still want to take this to the stove, it’s easily feasible in an hour or two, tops.

Souper Stew

Cioppino is a complete thought, and thus, a complete one-pot meal. That said, it does beg for a wedge of crusty bread (yes, sourdough) to best sop up all the rich broth. If you’re having friends over and want to stretch it further, a peppery arugula salad would be an excellent counterpoint and of course, it pairs beautifully with a dry white wine. Plan to buy an extra bottle, just in case.

Tides of Change

Just as the tides of San Francisco Bay ebb and flow, so too does the legacy of cioppino evolve, shaped by time, necessity, and now, compassion. While the classic version pays tribute to seafaring traditions, this mushroom-forward interpretation speaks to a modern mindset, valuing sustainability without sacrificing depth of flavor. It’s remarkable how these humble fungi can bridge such a wide culinary gap, offering a taste of the ocean while staying firmly rooted to the forest floor. Tradition isn’t something we preserve—it’s something we reinvent.

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Debunking The Detox

I’m vehemently against the entire concept of a detox. Our bodies are quite good at detoxifying themselves naturally, thank you very much. Even if there was some need for an assist, you’d better believe that a brief regime of liquefied vegetables wouldn’t be the cure. Despite that, I’m willing to make peace with the Green Detox Broth from The Soup Peddler on the grounds of improper naming.

It strikes me as one big mistake. For starters, it’s no mere broth, but a thick bowlful of hearty soup, given body from an abundance of pureed zucchini and broccoli. The only thing true about the moniker is that it’s green. Simple, soothing, and undeniably nutritious, I’m not mad at the savory brew itself. I’d just like to see the peer-reviewed studies that show its efficacy in cleansing.

Intoxicating Flavors

Whatever imagined impurities it’s meant to banish aside, the greatest asset of all is that The Soup Peddler has made this recipe available online. Though I refuse to call it by its original name, the basic concept is an essential staple here. I’ve made just a few small tweaks and offer additional options for adaptation, if you’re a detox deviant like me, too.

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Trash Talk

Sometimes you just feel like hot garbage. Other times, you feel like eating hot garbage.

Wait, stay with me here!

Good Garbage

Though I’ve long been an outspoken proponent of eating trash, salvaging scraps and otherwise wasted food, I’m talking about something else entirely here. “Garbage” is a term used more liberally in this case, as a flippant descriptor of such an unapologetically messy, overloaded pile of fried potatoes. Not every meal needs to be gorgeous to have instant appeal. It’s perfect for when comfort food cravings become increasingly urgent, overriding any concerns about sticky fingers or hot sauce stains.

My hot garbage fries were inspired by the silly little plastic trash can vessel, to be perfectly honest, but probably work even better on a plate. Every crispy plank of fluffy fried potato should be saturated with the mess on top; a creamy, spicy sauce, meatless steak, crunchy onions, and sliced jalapeños for a final fiery bite. The combination is so simple, so obvious, that it feels redundant to write out a full recipe… And yet, it does serve as a helpful reminder that yes, it is precisely that simple and obvious.

Make Your Own Mess

Use this blueprint to build your own French fry dumpster fire upon. A few quick and easy swaps include:

  • Vegan Steak: As a luxury item, this isn’t one I often have on hand either. Any beef-like plant-based protein works beautifully (or sloppily?) here, such as crumbled veggie burgers, chopped seitan, meatless grounds, or even old fashioned TVP chunks.
  • Yellow Onion: Some people don’t appreciate the raw edge of an uncooked onion, and while they’re wrong, that’s okay. Use sliced scallions or chives for the same allium essence, minus the harsh sinus stinging.
  • Cilantro: Similarly, some poor souls process the flavor of cilantro as being akin to soap. My condolences. Either omit it or try using fresh basil for a flavorful change of pace.
  • Jalapeños: If you want to really pump up the heat, opt for peppers that fall high on the Scoville scale, such as serranos, habaneros, or scotch bonnets. Proceed with caution!

Trash is Cash

Next time you’re having a trashy day, don’t fight it. Lean into the hot mess with an equally chaotic, disorderly, and satisfyingly sloppy pile of hot garbage fries. If it’s so bad that you need a good cry, you can always blame the hot peppers, too.

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