Category: Crochet

With tight scheduling comes a degree of madness, as I’m quickly learning. It takes more than just a pair of fast legs and an eye on the clock to make it everywhere on time, and if you’re not at the top of your game, your consolation prize will be a door in the face. How cruel it is to have a teacher who locks the door on those poor students who had the misfortune of being just a minute or two behind schedule! Most offenses are forgivable – Late papers can generally be given extensions, confusion over the class material can be remedied by extra help after class – But arriving after class is slated to begin? The worst crime a student could commit in terms of their studies.

Of course, being conditioned with the saying that the “early bird catches the worm,” whether I try to not, I always manage to be the first person in almost every class, sometimes barging in a full 10 minutes early. Trust me, it doesn’t sound like a whole lot, but another 10 minutes that a typical college kid can sleep, scramble to finish forgotten homework, or maybe even take their first shower in weeks is absolutely invaluable. Thus my madness- Despite such a crazy time strain to get work done and make it to classes, I’m forced to slow down when trudging off to those dust-coated buildings with their ancient text books instead of picking up my pace.

Taking a “leisurely”stroll to Japanese Literature, trying to take in every last green leaf and ashen pebble so as not to arrive a full 15 minutes early, I spotted a surprising creature sniffing about in the midday sunlight the other day…

Very rarely do you see dogs on campus, and even more peculiar was the lack of collar or identification of any sort. Not the least bit shy, he bounded right over to where I stood, staring blankly with curiosity, jumping about enthusiastically and encouraging me to rain attention down on him. Naturally I obliged, but I couldn’t just pet the solitary pup and continue on my way with a clear conscience, not knowing whether he might have to spend the night in the dump or the pound. Luckily, a small margin of time remained, and I hurried him back to the safety of my room, set out a generous meal of whatever could be salvaged from the pantry, and ran off to my obligations.

Crazy and brazen move as that was, I simply wouldn’t feel satisfied leaving the sweet little fellow to fend for himself in the cold, cruel world out there. Unfortunately, this arrangement can’t last for long, since there’s a strict policy against pets in the dorm. Because of this, I need your help! Are you interested in adopting this adorable stray? He’s completely house broken, very loving, and definitely low maintenance. Just in case there is more than one interested foster parent, I thought I might make this into a contest, since it’s been a while, hasn’t it? I’m afraid this one will be much harder, but you guys are so smart, I’m going to change the rules a bit: Even if someone nails it, I want everyone to keep guessing, and I’ll put all of the correct answers in a hat and choose the winner at random. You will have until Saturday, September 22, 10 am EST to guess, so, can you tell me what this is…?

You can only make one guess, so make it count! Good luck!

As a vegan and professed lover of fruits and vegetables, there is rarely any sort of produce that I might turn up my nose at- Brussels sprout and beets aside. Funny to think that as a kid, anything green and theoretically edible was the most revolting thing to find on my dinner plate. Yes, I’ve come a long way, because I wouldn’t so much as touch those same harvest gems that I enjoy to no end these days. Of course I still have some reservation when it comes to certain offerings that truly rubbed me the wrong way many years ago, and an unfair bias does still exist against a couple of the most innocuous items found in your standard market, such as pears.

Finding them piled in a heap at the end of the cafeteria’s line up of lackluster dishes, I decided to take a chance and give those otherwise unappetizing fruits another chance. Stealing a few away into my messenger bag, I returned to the privacy of my room to slice into the pale green flesh and see what lay beneath. Small seeds tucked comfortably into the center, like a few small children tucked safely into the covers of their bed, I immediately noticed my attitude towards this edible oddity was quickly shifting to a more positive light. Something about it just seemed so delicate while still remaining strong between my teeth. Unlike the pears of yore, this ripe beauty yielded readily to a firm bite, quickly contrasting from my memory of the rock-solid, stone-like fruits that had been forced upon me. Sweet but in a very modest way, anyone would be hard pressed to say that they didn’t like pears such as this.

Admittedly, these aren’t exactly going to top my list of favorite fruits, as few things could top my affinity for Fuji apples, but I think that pears could at least join the running now.

Completely uninterested in the work at hand, it took a lot to summon up any motivation to even skim through my growing list of assignments soon to be due. After procrastinating for as long as my workaholic disposition would allow, I finally settled in before the glow of the computer screen and began plunking down words. Getting into a groove, it seemed as though my trepidation was for nothing, as the sentences began to flow freely in no time and I was working up a steam, moving towards completion at the speed of lightning. All was looking good… When suddenly a shrill buzzing noise pierced through my concentration, shattering any thought process that might have been useful to writing a comprehensive article. Shaken right down to my toes, I hurried over and opened the door, only to discover that the rude buzzing became louder than the sound of a jet engine cranking at full speed. Seeing other residents rushing out of their rooms and toward the stairwell, it finally clicked that perhaps this was indeed the fire alarm going off, and maybe, just maybe, I should exit the building before I actually saw flames.

Of course, having gone through the mandatory fire drills every month throughout elementary, middle, and high school, I felt no need for real alarm… Until I passed by the second floor on my way out. Thick, grey smoke filled the air and the smell of burning timber permeated through every pore. Moving a little bit faster now, I reached the green courtyard outside to discover that the firemen had already arrived.

Standing tall with his hose at the ready, this strong, brave fireman rushed ahead of the crowd and into the building. Watching his yellow uniform disappear into the smog within, it was then that it hit me; This could be for real. What would happen to my computer, forget about the document still open on the screen? What about my camera? What about my yarn?? Thoroughly immersed within my own panic, only snippets of conversation from the girls around me filtered through: “…happened three times in three days last year…”, “…burnt onions…”, “…oversensitive smoke detectors…”

Regaining some degree of composure, I assured myself that this sort of thing must happen all the time in college dorms, especially when there are 3 kitchens on every floor. Forcing those panicked thoughts down into the pit of my stomach, I waited impatiently for the fearless fire fighter to emerge once more and tell us about the damage.

Exiting the doors with a mischievous smirk on his face, I couldn’t help but be puzzled by what he might find so amusing in all of this. Many girls rushed up and asked him to give it us straight: What was destroyed? Which floor got it worst? But above all, what caused this potential tragedy?

…Turns out that someone just reheated some leftover pizza for a little too long and took it into the “extra crispy” stage, finishing with a nice black exterior and plenty of smoke.

As someone who could be described as the polar opposite of a social butterfly, having so many other people within such close proximity is a new and somewhat disturbing thing. Having a friend drop in with no notice is a wonderful surprise, something I had never experienced before due to a home that was located smack-dab in the middle of nowhere, USA. This would all be well and good, but it seems as if these good friends might be hard to come by, and all too often it’s the inconsiderate jerk who shows up at your door instead.

Come midnight, I tend to enjoy sleeping, but I seem to be the odd man out on campus. Without curfew or parental guidance, I don’t blame these kids for wanting to run free, doing as they wish without a care in the world… But that doesn’t mean that I condone the wild antics I’ve observed in this short week or so. Crazy parties with music blasting out all windows at these typically quiet hours of the night are not such a nice thing, but even worse is when someone goes out of their way to be a nuisance to those who would prefer to actually get some rest. Such was the case when a knock on the door came last night, making for quite a rude awakening.

Oh, look who came by to visit, an old “friend” of mine! Already plastered and looking a bit unsteady on his feet, it might not have even occurred to him what day of the week it was, let alone what time of day. Caught red handed with the bottle of beer still adhered firmly in his iron grip, he burped out a half-way coherent invitation for me to come join the party down the hall. Enticing as that sounded, I gently refused and started closing the door, but this “friend” wouldn’t hear any of it- Who wouldn’t want to party all night and get completely smashed, after all? Settling down as gracefully as a sedated elephant right where he had stood, I couldn’t very well slam the door with this huge, flabby obstruction- I mean, body, right there.

Continuing to plead his case in attempts to pry me out of bed and into the disorienting mix of too many bodies, too much alcohol, and too loud music, things were looking worse and worse by the minute- For the both of us. Eye staying closed for a little bit longer than the standard blink, the booze appeared to finally be getting the best of his already compromised brain. Still, holding on to his previous threat of taking me to the party, I feared there would be no polite way to refuse. Truly, I do still care about this guy… He just needs to learn some manners is all. Lest I lose more friends than I make, I slowly began to put on socks and shoes just to see what all the commotion was about, all the while prepared to make a wild dash back to the safety of my bed after a maximum of 5 minutes. Securing buckles and shoe laces, I looked back to my “friend” to announce that I would give into his pleas just this one time… Only to find that the issue had already resolved itself.

Flat out on his back, he was clearly unfit to do more partying tonight at least! Thankfully for me, the alcohol had gotten the best of him this time- I just hope that he can tone down his voracious appetite for beer next time the am hours roll around.

Although it may seem fairly straightforward and simple, I’m finding that heat is a relative term. At home, lounging in my comfortable air-conditioned bedroom, I thought it was terribly hot out- Sweltering, even! God forbid I actually venture outside and subject myself to the full force of that brutal, heartless sun! Now, enclosed in a dorm where my only “air conditioning” comes from a tiny, desk top fan that only moves hot air around, those “hot” summer days before were truly more like a temperate summer dream. With few options to aid the situation, I’ve been tempted more than once to squeeze myself into the mini-fridge at night to sleep. Opening a window at night lets in more sounds of drunken partying than cool air, and when morning comes it seems as though I must have gone sleep-swimming, judging by the pools of sweat surrounding me.

Truly, it’s inconceivable that anyone would actually be able to suffer through this sort of heat on a regular basis, and even more impossible that it might be an ideal habitat for some. Even ice cubes frozen solid don’t last long in temperatures such as this, but unfortunately, I don’t have the luxury of sitting in front of the freezer all day; Eventually, it becomes evident that I might actually have to attend classes.

Marching outside to find the correct building, the bag slung over my shoulder becoming heavier by the minute, I can feel every follicle screaming under the sun. Eyes glazing over, it’s hard to know where I’m going, even if I had known the campus well in the first place. It must have been some strange mirage or the result of sun-stroke, but glancing over from the paved path, I could have sworn that a sandy desert stretched out before me, and it truly seemed appropriate to find in this sort of heat. Now, while the sudden change of landscape didn’t alarm me in the least, sitting serenely on a rock was the strangest creature I had ever seen.

Not only was it strange to find any sort of wildlife on campus, brave enough to walk alongside rowdy students, that dodos were completely extinct in the first place! If only I had any wits about me I might have been able to make more sense of this, but simply writing this odd sight off as a mirage or figment of my imagination, I gathered up what strength remained in my over-heated and tired mind and pushed on towards class, mopping the sweat of my brow and squinting just to see through the sun’s glare.

At this point, I could have seen a dirty puddle and imagined it to be a clear, cool oasis of drinking water and tried to slurp it up, so perhaps this dodo had been no more than common pigeon in real life.

A real dodo in Massachusetts, back from extinction? I guess we’ll never know…