GuacTober

Halloween has always been my favorite holiday, though my appreciation for it has changed substantially over the years. Long gone are the nights spent trick-or-treating, seeking the thrill of the hunt as much as the sugar high to follow. Off-the-shelf costumes are permanently off the shopping list, since I refuse to dress as the “sexy” version of literally anything. Now, I’m content to enjoy the spooky season in a similar way to other special events: By playing with my food.

Whether you’re throwing a Halloween party for one or one hundred, solid snacks are an absolute must. Balancing out the abundance of candy and booze alike, reasonably healthy and savory options are essential for a killer bash. For that, I turn to classic guacamole, but with a ghoulish twist.

Pick your favorite recipe and get crafty! Here are four different ways to dress up the same old green goop as a fun, festive party starter.

Sick Dip

I’m sure everyone’s familiar with the classic barfing jack-o-lantern motif by now, but what if we could make that into an edible centerpiece? Allow me to present sick dip, replacing the pumpkin with a carved bell pepper.

  1. Cut around the top in a jagged pattern just like you would for a traditional jack-o-lantern. Pull off the top and remove the seeds and membrane inside.
  2. Use a paring knife to carefully carve out eyes and a large opening for the mouth.
  3. Place the pepper on a serving plate and fill it with your guacamole, pushing some out the mouth hole.
  4. Fill the rest of the plate with more guacamole and place the top back onto the pepper.
  5. Serve with the paring knife sticking out of the pepper for guests to slice off their own crudites.

Guacamole Graveyard

Parting is such savory sorrow when the final resting place is this delicious. You could pipe “RIP” onto the tombstones with smooth guaca-mole, but I prefer to keep it simple and classy.

  1. Spread your guacamole into a rectangular dish an in even layer.
  2. Stick crackers in, spaced at regular intervals, in two or three rows.
  3. Spoon a mound of minced black olives or tapenade in front of each cracker tombstone to make the burial plots.
  4. Serve with more crackers on the side.

Monster Mash

Kids will especially love this silly Frankenstein face! You may even be able to convince them to eat their veggies this way. You can even blend fresh spinach into the guacamole to make it more green and add an extra superfood boost.

  1. Spread your guacamole in a circle on a round plate, leaving a larger border at the top.
  2. Stick crackers or cut vegetable crudites into the top part for the hair.
  3. Cut a black olive in half and add them to the middle as eyes.
  4. Cut a jagged smile out of a bell pepper or carrot slice for the mouth.

Wicked Web

When all else fails, weave a simple spiderweb that’s guaranteed to catch guests’ attention.

  1. Spread your guacamole into a round dish in an even layer.
  2. Drizzle plain, unsweetened vegan yogurt, ranch dressing, or sour cream in a spiral pattern, starting in the center and radiating out.
  3. Use a toothpick to drag the loops alternating inward and outward from the center.
  4. For the spider, place one whole olive near the middle of the web. Cut another olive in half lengthwise, and then slice four little legs from each piece. Arrange them next to the side body.
  5. Enjoy with any of your favorite dippers.

Get into the Halloween spirit and whip up a ghastly appetizer that will haunt your friends and family all season! What’s your favorite diabolical dish?

Hot Take on Hot Lunch

Living in the moment is best way to experience life, unencumbered by past regrets and future concerns, but it certainly has its pitfalls, too. Wrapped up in summertime revelry, I didn’t even realize that we’re fast approaching doomsday for every child and young adult under the age of 18: The first day of school. Creeping earlier and earlier across the calendar every year, I feel a bit blindsided to learn that local school will be back in session as early as next week. What kind of cruel joke is that, to pull children out of the sun’s golden glow, away from the beckoning beaches and parks, stuffing them into stiffing locked rooms without windows, without joy, without apologies? Hopefully the transition isn’t as harsh as memory suggests, but it’s still a hard sacrifice to make for anyone yearning to squeeze the very last drops of sweetness out of this fleeting season.

If there was anything that could inspire any enthusiasm for this kind of sacrifice, it would have to be the promise of good food. Of course, that’s pretty much the opposite of what you can expect from any institutional cafeteria menu, which is why a properly packed lunch is essential. Though the dark days of school lunches are well behind me, the memories of soggy PB + J sandwiches and stale granola bars are indelibly seared into my memory. No one should have to endure such hardship, especially if they hope to put any positive energy into their education after noon.

Ages ago, back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I was still in high school, I developed a compact little e-book entitled Lunchbox Bites, filled with all the sweet and savory morsels that got me from homeroom to sixth period. No longer available for sale, it’s been languishing among all the forgotten recipes gathering dust in my digital archive. It seems such a shame to waste this potentially helpful resource, as new generations of young vegans grow up with the same hunger for quality nutrition as I once did.

For the love of food, for the good of the community, I’m now making Lunchbox Bites completely free to download. Bringing back old favorites like Coffee Buzz Energy Bars and Root Beer Pudding, there’s plenty for students of all ages to enjoy. Even if you’re just a student of life, there’s never a bad time to enjoy a big batch of Hummus Crackers, too.

Forgive me, if you would, for the antiquated terminology and terrible photography. Consider it an heirloom, a relic of a bygone era. “Margarine” should be read as “vegan butter,” “soymilk” simply as “non-dairy milk” (any variety will do), and canola oil, while fine, would be better if replaced by a light olive oil, avocado oil, or rice bran oil. There’s still a whole lot of good to reap from these basic concepts, and I must admit, it’s somewhat charming to take in the full glory of this throwback to a simpler time.

Prepare yourself properly for a brand new school year; don’t show up hungry, and if you’re feeling particularly generous, make sure you bring enough to share with the class. Cafeteria food doesn’t hold a candle to anything homemade.

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A Very Merry Unbirthday to You!

Birthdays come and birthdays go. Some are occasions to rejoice, some are best forgotten. Ready or not, they happen to the best of us, and we find a way to struggle through, as it sure beats the alternative. For the remaining 364 days a year, we tend to gloss over the fact that we’re still getting older, still surviving to see another morning; why shouldn’t we celebrate that too? Treat yourself to a nice dinner because it’s Monday. Splurge on some fancy olive oil because you answered all your emails. Throw yourself a party because you damn well feel like it. Most importantly of all, eat cake simply because it’s delicious.

Birthday cake is the first thing that came to mind upon cracking open a bottle of baker’s extract, my new favorite secret ingredient. Primarily vanilla but so much more, Rodelle describes it as having notes of chocolate, caramel, cream and oak mingling within the dark emulsion. If you ask me, it’s like vanilla with the dial turned up to 11. Robust and smooth, just a few drops add incredible richness and complexity to any sweet treat, which is why I’ve been reaching for this bottle more often than not. Blend it into pancakes for legitimate cakes made in a pan. Add a splash to a protein drink transform it into a cake batter milkshake. In the case of today’s recipe, mix things up with simple cereal bars, and create an everyday birthday treat.

The much beloved childhood cereal bar morphs into a convincing cookie and cake hybrid with just a few small tweaks. Crunchy, chewy squares of crisp rice are bound together with a simple sticky syrup, bolstered by that extraordinary baker’s extract and just a touch of cake flour to really cement the theme. White chocolate stands in for frosting, keeping these snacks packable, portable, and perfectly suited for whipping up on every unbirthday you please. Speaking of which, don’t you have one coming up soon, too? Maybe you should start planning your next batch right now.

Though technically optional, I would argue that it’s really not a birthday without sprinkles, so err on the side of whimsy and let it rain. If you really insist on being an adult about it, chopped nuts could be an acceptable topping as well… Albeit considerably less fancy-free.

This post was made possible thanks to Rodelle and their sweet contributions.

Yield: Makes 10 – 12 Bars

Birthday Cake Crispy Rice Treats

Birthday Cake Crispy Rice Treats

Crunchy, chewy squares of crisp rice are bound together with a simple sticky syrup, bolstered by that extraordinary baker’s extract and just a touch of cake flour to really cement the theme. White chocolate stands in for frosting, keeping these snacks packable, portable, and perfectly suited for whipping up on every unbirthday you please.

Prep Time 5 minutes
Cook Time 5 minutes
Additional Time 30 minutes
Total Time 40 minutes

Ingredients

  • 5 Cups Crispy Brown Rice Cereal
  • 3 Tablespoons Cake Flour
  • 1 Tablespoon Vegan Butter
  • 1/2 Cup Light Agave Nectar
  • 1/2 Cup Granulated Sugar
  • 1/4 Teaspoon Salt
  • 1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract
  • 1 Teaspoon Rodelle Baker’s Extract
  • 6 Ounces (About 1 Cup) Chopped Vegan White Chocolate
  • 1 – 3 Tablespoons Assorted Sprinkles

Instructions

  1. Line an 8 x 8-inch square baking pan with aluminum foil and lightly grease. Combine the cereal and flour in a large bowl; set aside.
  2. Set a medium saucepan over low heat and begin by melting the butter. Once liquefied, add in the agave, sugar, and salt, stirring as needed until the sugar crystals dissolve. Bring the mixture to a steady boil and then cook for an additional 3 – 5 minutes, until it appears to have thickened slightly. Remove from the heat and quickly stir in the both extracts.
  3. Pour the contents of your saucepan over the dry mix and fold it in carefully but briskly with a wide non-stick spatula, being careful not to crush the cereal.
  4. Transfer the sticky mixture into your prepared pan and gently press it out into an even layer. It’s easiest if you grease the bottom of a flat measuring cup and use that to smooth it down, applying firm downward strokes across the full pan of cereal.
  5. Seal the deal by melting down the white chocolate and pouring it on top. Distribute the sprinkles equally across the top, and let the chocolate cool until set. Slice and celebrate!

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Nutrition Information:

Yield:

12

Serving Size:

1

Amount Per Serving: Calories: 366Total Fat: 16gSaturated Fat: 9gTrans Fat: 0gUnsaturated Fat: 5gCholesterol: 11mgSodium: 151mgCarbohydrates: 54gFiber: 0gSugar: 42gProtein: 3g

All nutritional information presented within this site are intended for informational purposes only. I am not a certified nutritionist and any nutritional information on BitterSweetBlog.com should only be used as a general guideline. This information is provided as a courtesy and there is no guarantee that the information will be completely accurate. Even though I try to provide accurate nutritional information to the best of my ability, these figures should still be considered estimations.

Got Greens?

Milk mustaches are out; juice mustaches are in. Unlocking a world of flavor and liquid nutrition that dairy could only dream of, it’s no surprise that fresh pressed produce has taken up the torch in this race for beverage dominance. Green Mustache is one of many companies making a splash with blended fruit and vegetable smoothies, all built upon a foundation of leafy greens like kale and spinach. Inspirational though unexceptional in this burgeoning field, the differentiating factor in their origin story is that these drinks are blended with younger tastes in mind, palatable for both kids and adults alike. More importantly, they don’t neglect the need for more traditional snacks with more mainstream appeal, which is what first sparked my attention- And appetite.

Though not green in color or overt taste, Mustache Munchies “Cheddarish” Crackers quietly sneak a serving of vegetative goodness into these adorable handlebar crisps. Tanned to a gentle golden hue, these aren’t the screaming florescent orange wafers of similar mainstream competitors. Instead, they’re a study of careful balance and nuance, bearing a subtle nutty undertone and light but naturally cheesy essence. Each piece is a perfect little bite, ensuring no crumbs nor mess to contend with later when munching on the run.

As a serial granola bar-eater, sweet snacks start to lose their appeal early on in the day, which makes these satisfyingly crunchy crackers an ideal alternative. I never thought a mustache might look good on me, but these lightly salted morsels could add stylish new flair to any smiling face.