Grate Expectations

Tempeh has more in common with cheese than you may think. Moldy soybean cakes and buttery curds look nothing alike on the surface, granted, but look deeper. Fermented, full of good bacteria, they’re both naturally funky, umami, and sometimes pungent. For years, I had the hazy idea to make tempeh into cheese by blending it with cashews, though it turns out I was vastly overthinking things. Tempeh is already halfway to cheese-ification, straight out of the package.

Brine and Dine

Inspired by Vegan Scratch Kitchen, it turns out that the only thing separating tempeh from becoming a wedge of genuine cheese is a simple brine, as basic as if you were making refrigerator pickles. Mesmerized by the golden shreds raining down in the dappled sunlight of a cozy kitchen, I knew I had to try it… With modifications, of course.

The Secret Ingredient: Time

Though easy to a fault, it is time-consuming, only in the sense that you can’t plan on having cheese ready for your spaghetti dinner that same day. It’s all passive, waiting for the tempeh to soak, and then dry, requiring minimal effort at every step. For someone with low energy and a limited attention span, it’s a boon to realize your timer is going off and you’re already done.

Falling Short of Grate-ness

Admittedly, the one thing my tempeh cheese (AKA tempeh Parmesan, though not to be confused with the Italian dish typically involving eggplants or chicken) falls short on is its grate-ability. It just crumbles under pressure, which is honestly not a terrible thing. You can use the chunky crumbles in salad like little hunks of cheese, or pulse the whole thing in your food processor to make a fine powder like you’d find in the green cans. I came to prefer this approach, since you can add in extra nooch in this step and boost the cheesy flavor accordingly.

Top This

For a cheesy topping that imitates dairy-based Parmesan, you can’t do any better than this novel, plant-based approach. Made from only whole foods, it’s a high-protein, gluten-free dynamo packed with probiotics, and most importantly, bold flavor!

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Cake Is The Answer, No Matter The Question

What exactly is “birthday cake flavor”? Given that a birthday cake is any cake you’ve graciously invited to the party, this abstract flavoring has less to do with the reality and diversity of celebratory desserts, and more to do with a collective American nostalgia surrounding them.

For my real birthday cake, I’d love something with matcha and pistachio; taro and praline; tonka bean and yuzu; anything but plain vanilla. And yet, if we’re talking about birthday cake flavor, or cake batter flavor, for that matter, that’s exactly what I’d crave.

Typically, birthday cake flavor is a nostalgic mix of:

  • Vanilla, being the classic and popular base flavor that most birthday cakes use
  • Buttery richness, often from a combination of moist, buttery baked layers and whipped buttercream frosting
  • Sweetness, found in ample supply throughout, in varying degrees of sugar-coma inducing saccharinity
  • Sprinkles, for a pop of color that looks like edible confetti, becoming a veritable pinata full of candy in every bite

So, for my 36 birthday, I’d like to share some cake with you, that brings together these elements that transcend actual cake, but invoke an overall feeling of joy, fun, and the festivity for the occasion. This recipe for Birthday Cake Ice Cream is straight out of my cookbook, Vegan à la Mode, which is still a reliable reference to this day.

As I pitched it then, ten years ago: No longer do you have to struggle with deciding between cake and ice cream; have them both in one frozen dessert! If it is simply too hot to turn on the oven, you can cheat a bit and purchase 6 vegan cupcakes instead of baking your own. Just scrape off the frosting before blending them up to make your frozen creation.

For a single serving twist, instead of moving the finished ice cream into a container to be served up in scoops, pack the soft ice cream into sturdy cupcake cups and let freeze solid. Right before eating or presenting them, pipe or spoon a dollop of frosting on top. Voila, a genuine ice cream cupcake!

Please join me in commemorating my latest milestone with the idea of birthday cake, with all the indulgence and festivity tied to the act of celebrating. I’ll scoop to that.

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We’re All Mad About Tea Here

Coming from a long line of tea-lovers, it’s no surprise that I was enamored with matcha and rooibos long before finding an affinity for coffee, too. Once I got a Nespresso machine to make instant espresso shots at home, the balance shifted significantly. It’s hard to compete with that level of convenience, consistency, and ease. Still, nothing can replace the craftsmanship of delicate Jasmine or bold earl grey. Thankfully, you don’t have to. Mad Tea is the brilliant solution that makes no compromises.

Sealed in fully compostable Nespresso Original Line capsules, Mad Tea is the first of its kind in many ways. No measuring, no steeping, no plastic trash; it really is the complete package. What grabbed my attention first, however, was the ability to make a fully vegan Thai tea latte in under 30 seconds. In fact, that’s true of all the flavors. The entire array is vegan, gluten-free, tree nut- and peanut-free, kosher, and even packed in separate facilities from all dairy ingredients! What more could you ask for in an afternoon (or evening) pick-me-up?

On that note, a big benefit to branching out from the usual Nespresso pods is that there are more low- and no-caffeine options to suit all times of day. Especially as I get older, I can’t expect to keep drinking rocket fuel and then sleep soundly later. Switching to tea pods not only satisfies my craving for a warm, comforting beverage but also allows me to enjoy my drinks without the jittery aftermath that often accompanies high-octane energy drinks, natural or otherwise.

Most importantly, it’s genuinely some of the best tea I’ve had outside of a cafe. There are currently eight flavors, spanning the globe for tea varietals:

  • Brown Sugar Milk Tea – Smooth and rounded, creamy and sweet. Ideal for making boba tea.
  • Chai Tea – Like pumpkin spice but better, folding cardamom, cinnamon, ginger, and cloves into every harmonious sip.
  • Matcha Tea – Rich, bold, and subtly grassy. Genuine matcha with body and froth, not some pale, generic “green tea” blend.
  • Chamomile Lavender Tea – Gentle, soothing, and clean, with a slightly herbaceous quality. Very relaxing and easy to drink.

  • Jasmine Milk Tea – Both calming and invigorating, highly aromatic with the scent of fresh blossoms and cut grass. Delicate yet luscious at any temperature.
  • Peach Oolong Tea – Remarkable juicy, fresh peach flavor. Perfectly sweetened, nothing else needed, brilliant both hot and cold.
  • Thai Tea – Vibrant orange from strong black tea, blended with star anise, cardamom, and a hint of vanilla. It begs for a splash of condensed coconut milk to complete the classic presentation.
  • Earl Grey Tea – Bright and zesty, with the essence of orange on a base of robust black tea.

For the indecisive, you can get a variety pack to try one of each, ensuring that every craving is covered.

Go on, get mad; to taste Mad Tea is to love it. Thankfully, you can use the code BITTERSWEET to save 10% through Madtea.com and keep it flowing.

This post was made possible as a collaboration with Mad Tea. My opinions can not be bought and all content is original. This page may contain affiliate links; thank you for supporting my blog!

Kiss And Tell

Lemon zest has become my new garlic. By which I mean, there’s no such thing as too much. If a recipe calls for a teaspoon, or pinch, or even just as an optional addition, you’d better believe I’m not going to stop zesting until that whole lemon is bald. Unlike garlic, this applies to everything, both sweet and savory (although truth be told, I have bridged that gap for the former, too.)

While there’s never a bad time for dark chocolate, I’ve been craving something lighter, brighter, and breezier. Lemon-Kissed Raspberry Bark is the answer. Invigorating lemon zest cuts the sweetness of white chocolate alongside tart freeze-dried raspberries, delivering a burst of high-contrast, full spectrum flavor in every bite.

Minimal Effort, Maximum Enjoyment

Like any good bark, be it of dark or white chocolate, half its beauty lies in its simplicity. All you really need are three basic ingredients, plus optional salt and sprinkles, because life is better with both. Then, it’s just one bowl, one spatula, and a microwave that stands between you and your prize. No fancy equipment or complicated steps are involved. Even on a hot summer’s day when the kitchen is a less inviting place, it’s an ideal dessert to either share or hoard.

A Zest For Life

Don’t even think about cutting back on the lemon zest. The only acceptable modification is to swap it with another citrus. Orange or lime zest are equally suitable understudies, but don’t forget more unconventional options like yuzu, buddha’s hand, pomelo, makrut lime, and of course, any combination of the aforementioned fruits, too. The raspberries may seem like the star of the show, but it’s really the zest that makes it a winning production.

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A Pretty Big Dill

Vegan cheese is booming. Long viewed as the final frontier for plant-based diets, the last holdout for hesitant omnivores, the choke-hold that Big Dairy has had on the industry is finally losing its grip. Still, the gap between accessible, everyday melting cheeses and gourmet cheeses fit for a charcuterie board is a wide, cavernous divide. When you want something nicer than generic cheddar-like shreds but not quite a triple cream brie, where’s there to turn?

Your own kitchen, of course.

Anyone who claims it’s impossible to make remarkable plant-based blocks and wedges at home clearly hasn’t even tried. There’s a hundred ways to go about it, but I happen to think that my latest approach especially is a pretty big dill. Dill Havarti, a soft, mild, and buttery cheese that originated in Denmark in the 19th century, is still a rare find in the dairy-free space. Distinctively fresh, herbal, and slightly tangy, it’s a timeless flavor combination and yet at the same time, an ideal option for celebrating spring.

It Slices! It Shreds! It Spreads! Yes, It Even MELTS!

When enjoyed within the first few hours, the texture is soft enough to use a schmear on bagels and toast. Once rested overnight, it solidifies into a proper soft block, fit to be sliced, shredded, and cubed at will.

Naturally, this beautiful block is 100% vegan and thus:

  • Dairy-free

But also made of pantry staples that make it affordable, accessible, and:

  • Oil-free
  • Nut-free
  • Seed-free
  • Gluten-free
  • Sugar-free

What About Carrageenan?

Don’t fall for the negative press surrounding this unnecessarily controversial ingredient. Carrageenan is derived from red seaweed, commonly used for its gelling, thickening, and stabilizing properties. Despite some health myths circulating, scientific studies have shown that carrageenan is perfectly safe for consumption. Agar, beloved by the vegan community for decades, has a lot in common.

Kappa carrageenan specifically is unique in making a stable gel that can be melted again after being set, creating something much more similar to dairy cheese. The structure itself is softer and creamier, as opposed to an agar gel that has a short, stiff bite. There’s nothing I would recommend as a reasonable substitute; it’s worth buying a bag online, especially when you consider how much money it can save you compared to buying artisan vegan cheese.

Better, Healthier Cheese For All

After going through untold amounts of pricey cashews and coconut oil, I can’t imagine going back. There’s nothing wrong with craving a better plant-based cheese than what’s on the market, no matter how many choices already exist. Until someone else steps up their dill Havarti game to produce something dairy-free on a larger scale, this is the only game in town. Luckily, it’s a win-win every time.

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