Fakin’ Bacon

Breakfast is usually my favorite meal of the day, whether I have the luxury of a relaxed, carefully crafted entree on the weekend, or even if it’s a hurried slice of toast before facing a full day of school. Just about any breakfast food in existence is generally all-around wonderful, often finding its way into any odd meal or snack. I don’t know about you, but cereal happens to be a normal dinner item in my house these days. With this casual approach to what is considered “appropriate” items for particular eating opportunities, I thought nothing of cooking up a nice big batch of bacon during a dinner date with a new friend.

Setting the uncooked protein down on the counter, I immediately noticed a shift in my friend’s body language. Becoming as stiff as a board and perhaps trying not to move in order to avoid detection, a worried expression clouded his eyes, soon giving way to unbridled fear. The tension emitting from this scared little piglet was so thick, you could cut it with a mere fork!

It didn’t take any spoken words for me to figure out what was going through his panic-stricken mind. So obvious was this horror, I could practically see his racing thoughts…

Bacon! How could she! If I don’t look out, I may end up as her next meal too!

Thankfully, this awkward misunderstanding quickly blew over once I removed the discarded cardboard covering from the trash, explaining my seemingly cruel choice in that evening’s supper. I hate even having real meat purchased by my parents taking up residence in the fridge, so it should never be a concern of any guests that I might touch it, let alone consider serving it. Besides, I’ve found that this fake bacon by Light Life tastes eerily close to the real thing, but made entirely out of soy and other vegan ingredients, you don’t need to be a pig to appreciate it!