Feeling Sluggish

Rarely do I purchase bananas in large batches due to my short attention span. Fresh and green, they will wait patiently on the counter with every intention of becoming a lovely yellow snack. However, by the time they finally reach that point, I’m either no longer in the mood to eat them, or I completely forget that I had bought them altogether until the entire house is filled with their pungent aroma. By the time I hunt down the source of the smell, a pile of fruit so dark brown that it’s practically decomposing will inevitably await me. Of course, they would still surely be salvageable if used in some sort of baking operation, but if I encouraged this idea, I would end up eating nothing but banana bread for months on end.

Passing through the produce section of the grocery store one day, I promptly forgot all of this sound reasoning upon spying the most vibrant bright green bananas I had ever seen. Just from the visual appeal alone, who could resist? So I defied my general rule and bought a huge bunch right then and there to sit in the kitchen until peak sweetness had been achieved.

For once, I actually did notice them at just the right time for consumption, but for a reasons other than recalling the fact that I personally left them there at one point in time. Please – that would be logical!

Rushing into the kitchen to prepare some quick meal, I was startled to see that my luscious bundle of forgotten fruit had been commandeered by what appeared to be a common snail. What on Earth was going on? I abruptly stopped my flurry of activity to question him as gently as I could, but received a confused response from the out of place creature. What was I talking about? Couldn’t I see that he was simply a banana slug, and it was simply acting on his natural instincts?

The poor thing! After so much time slinking across the lonely dirt floor, envying all of the hip, young slugs with no shells to weigh them down, my friend here must have been experiencing an identity crisis!

Despite my desire to shoo him away and inform him of his grievous error, I couldn’t find it in my heart to break the news to him. He seemed so happy, so care free and at ease as a “slug,” I figured it couldn’t do much harm to allow him to perpetuate this new lifestyle atleast until he tired of it and returned to his natural place in the world. Seeing as there are very few places to find bananas growing outside in this section of the world, I agreed to provide him with nourishment for as long as he needed.

I guess I’m going to be eating banana bread a lot more often from now on.

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