Scout’s Honor

Shredded coconut bums me out. Sweetened or not; long strands or short sprinkles; flat flakes or coarse grounds; I cringe inwardly every time that distinctive ingredient pops up in a recipe. I love coconut in general, but the moment as you deprive it of moisture and distill it down to only its most fibrous components, you’ve lost me as a fan. As a result, shredded coconut tends to sit around in my freezer for unconscionable amounts of time. After fulfilling its duty for whatever assignment it was called for, I have no inclination to consume it myself. That’s why I’m thrilled to pack it up in a caramel tart and pawn it off on others.

Coconut Head

The beloved girl scout samoa cookie inspired this supersized snack, employing a simple shortbread crust topped with that cursed coconut filling, finished with a liberal drizzle of dark chocolate. Quick, uncomplicated, and straight to the point, there’s no better way I can think of to use up a full 3 cups of shredded coconut in one go.

Worthy of a Baking Merit Badge

Samoas, not to be confused with Indian samosas, sometimes go by the name of Caramel deLites, depending on which troops do the baking. First being offered on the girl scout menu in 1975, the only explanation for the original name is that it likely aligns with the island of Samoa, where coconut is one of its major exports. Seems a bit random to me, given all the possible sources for coconut products, but I wasn’t the one who chose the title.

Lightly toasted and wrapped up in a gooey yet sliceable brown sugar substrate, resting just beneath a thin veneer of chocolate and comfortably nested on top of a crisp, slightly crumbly crust, shredded coconut is utterly transformed. My surplus was immediately plundered, as slice after slice hit plates, then to-go containers for seconds and midnight snacks.

Did this finally change my tune on the desiccated dread? Absolutely not. I’m just happy to find a compelling approach for using it up and sharing with others. To each their own, although better together; coconut lovers are welcome here to eat all of it for me.

Continue reading “Scout’s Honor” →

Hannah (BitterSweet)6 Comments

A Close Shave

Cauliflower can be many things, but rarely is it allowed to be itself these days. While grabbing a bite with friends, seeing it appear on a pizza—not blended into the crust, but perched right on top in all its snowy white, raw glory—was such a shock, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Everything about it sounds questionable, like biting into a chunk of impenetrable starch, but the cut made all the difference. Slicing it paper thin, as I had never seen before, was a revelation. Cool and crisp against the warm, gooey base, it was like an entirely new vegetable.

Mon Petit Chou-Fleur

Rather than pulling apart the clustered budding stems, considering the head as a whole completely changes the vegetable. Elegant yet understated, distinctive and still versatile, shaved cauliflower is now my favorite salad starter. Leave the lettuce at home for a more substantial, sturdy salad.

In this particular blend, thinly sliced cauliflower provides a delicate crunch that pairs perfectly with the tender edamame and cool cucumber. Crumbled vegan feta adds a creamy twang, while toasted pepitas finish with a nutty bite. Tossed in a silky, lemony tahini dressing, the salad is both refreshing and full of depth, with a hint of sweetness to balance the otherwise disparate elements.

The key to this cauliflower revelry? A mandoline.

Mandoline Tune-Up

Mandoline slicers are the most dangerous tools found in a kitchen. Otherwise known as a finger guillotine, digit decapitator, or the one-swipe skin remover, mandolines are notorious for their ability to quickly and efficiently cut through everything in their path. More often than not, that means those pitched razor blades mow through more than just carrots or potatoes. A moment of distraction or a slip of the hand can leave even experienced cooks seeing red. If you’re not afraid of your mandoline, you haven’t used it enough.

Looking Sharp

Why recommend such a hazardous appliance, even after numerous experiences that left a mark? There’s simply no other tool for the job. While a properly honed knife is essential, the sharpest edge can’t compete with the precision and consistency of a mandoline. That’s especially true when making delicate, thin shavings of cauliflower, rather than coarsely crumbled florets. So yes, despite those dire warnings, I’m telling you to put yourself in peril and use this modern torture device. If you’d like to keep all ten fingers, I have three easy tips for you:

  1. USE
  2. THE
  3. HAND GUARD

That’s it, that’s the secret to success. If you’ve lost the hand guard, don’t make this recipe. I won’t be held responsible for your hospital bill.

As visually stunning as it is delicious, each bite of cauliflower is paper-thin, creating a light, crisp, and satisfying texture. The result is a refreshing, bright salad that showcases the simplicity of raw cauliflower. Suspend your disbelief, watch your fingers, and give it a shot. Cauliflower is best when it can be itself, front and center.

Continue reading “A Close Shave” →

Hannah (BitterSweet)4 Comments

Cool Beans

Everything old is new again, as evidenced by the heirloom bean renaissance. As a person with no family heirlooms to speak of, I’m quite content to accept this treasure trove of ancient legumes in lieu of jewelry, furniture, or fine China. Health is wealth, after all, and tepary beans especially are certainly rich in nutrition, flavor, and culinary inspiration. These stunning onyx gems were inherited from a generous friend, AKA chosen family, quickly becoming my favorite living legacy to receive.

A Brief History of Tepary Beans

Hardy and robust, these small seeds have managed to thrive in the harsh, arid conditions of southwestern United States and Mexico, surviving drought and blights since before colonization began. Where common beans (p. vulgaris), lima beans (p. lunatus), and runner beans (p. coccineus) would wither into dust, tepary beans managed take root, establishing themselves as a critical staple of the native peoples. At times of scarcity, they accounted for nearly half of the dietary protein for the indigenous communities that cultivated them.

Fifty Shades of Brown

Although brown tepary beans seem to be most common today, they’re incredibly diverse and grow in at least forty-six distinct colors, including white, brown, beige, black, and mottled, with some plants delivering monotone harvests while others produce a full spectrum. It turns out that the black tepary beans I got my hands on are the most elusive, developed by separating the black seeds before planting the other white or brown seeds separately over the course of many generations.

What Do Tepary Beans Taste Like?

Flavors vary based on color, with white teparies tasting sweeter and more mild than nutty brown or deeply earthy black tepary beans. Across the board, their texture is consistently firm, meaty, and sturdy. These are beans that won’t fall apart under pressure, remaining distinct even after long cooking times. That makes them ideal for adding into salads, salsas, tacos, burritos, braises, soups, chili; anywhere you want whole, well-defined beans.

Nutritional Prowess of Tepary Beans

Historians and nutritionists agree that tepary beans are one of the healthiest legumes around, easily explaining why it was such a staple for aboriginal tribes, and makes the case for renewed enthusiasm today. Tepary beans have more protein and higher fiber than ordinary beans and a lower glycemic index (41-44), so you’ll get more bang for your bean buck with every meal. Especially when compared to meat, this plant-protein is a boon for anyone who wants to eat and feel better in the long run.

How To Cook Tepary Beans

Being drought-resistant can make tepary beans somewhat cooking-resistant too. Their tough outer skins refuse to yield under quick cooking conditions, so patience is key. If you have a slow cooker or pressure cooker, now is the time to plug it in. Cover the beans with a generous amount of water, adding more throughout the cooking process if needed, especially on the stove, if it evaporates too quickly.

Aromatics like whole garlic cloves, halved onions, bay leaves, and kombu, are excellent additions to infuse more savory flavor, though not mandatory. Always add salt after cooking, not before, or else they may never soften sufficiently.

  • In a pressure cooker, unsoaked tepary beans can cook in 35 minutes with a natural release.
  • On the stove top, unsoaked tepary beans may take 1 1/2 to 2 hours to cook when simmered over low heat, while beans soaked overnight may take 45 to 60 minutes.
  • Using a slow cooker set to low, unsoaked beans will take 6 to 8 hours, or 3 to 4 hours on high.
  • Oven braising times are very similar to the stove top method, taking roughly 1 1/2 to 2 hours to cook unsoaked tepary beans all the way through.

Drain thoroughly and enjoy hot, cold, or at room temperature.

Heirlooms with Style and Substance

Go forth and eat your heirlooms! Tepary beans are a link to the past that are every bit as vital and relevant in the present day. Instead of some dusty relics that sit on the shelf, these beans have real benefits, proving their value above and beyond inert precious metals and stones. Find yourself some tepary beans today, and start a new family legacy.

Hannah (BitterSweet)6 Comments

Cake Is The Answer, No Matter The Question

What exactly is “birthday cake flavor”? Given that a birthday cake is any cake you’ve graciously invited to the party, this abstract flavoring has less to do with the reality and diversity of celebratory desserts, and more to do with a collective American nostalgia surrounding them.

For my real birthday cake, I’d love something with matcha and pistachio; taro and praline; tonka bean and yuzu; anything but plain vanilla. And yet, if we’re talking about birthday cake flavor, or cake batter flavor, for that matter, that’s exactly what I’d crave.

Typically, birthday cake flavor is a nostalgic mix of:

  • Vanilla, being the classic and popular base flavor that most birthday cakes use
  • Buttery richness, often from a combination of moist, buttery baked layers and whipped buttercream frosting
  • Sweetness, found in ample supply throughout, in varying degrees of sugar-coma inducing saccharinity
  • Sprinkles, for a pop of color that looks like edible confetti, becoming a veritable pinata full of candy in every bite

So, for my 36 birthday, I’d like to share some cake with you, that brings together these elements that transcend actual cake, but invoke an overall feeling of joy, fun, and the festivity for the occasion. This recipe for Birthday Cake Ice Cream is straight out of my cookbook, Vegan à la Mode, which is still a reliable reference to this day.

As I pitched it then, ten years ago: No longer do you have to struggle with deciding between cake and ice cream; have them both in one frozen dessert! If it is simply too hot to turn on the oven, you can cheat a bit and purchase 6 vegan cupcakes instead of baking your own. Just scrape off the frosting before blending them up to make your frozen creation.

For a single serving twist, instead of moving the finished ice cream into a container to be served up in scoops, pack the soft ice cream into sturdy cupcake cups and let freeze solid. Right before eating or presenting them, pipe or spoon a dollop of frosting on top. Voila, a genuine ice cream cupcake!

Please join me in commemorating my latest milestone with the idea of birthday cake, with all the indulgence and festivity tied to the act of celebrating. I’ll scoop to that.

Continue reading “Cake Is The Answer, No Matter The Question” →

Hannah (BitterSweet)8 Comments