BitterSweet

An Obsession with All Things Handmade and Home-Cooked


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I Did It All For the Cookie

For all the redundant recipes in the world, I still relish the individual personal touches that set each one apart. Even if it’s instructions for the same old chocolate chip cookie that half the country’s grandmothers made for decades and has been transcribed on over a million pads of paper or digital text files, each iteration bears the unique voice of the writer. As personal as a fingerprint, one can hear the voice of each baker through their choice of words, describing exactly how those familiar ingredients should be managed, what the end results should look like, perhaps throwing in a bit of sage wisdom along the way. What grabs the most attention, however, is always the title. Headlines by nature lead the way into any new conversation, and the way that recipe writers decide to engage prospective cooks and bakers says volumes all by itself. Some titles need no explanation, such as something straightforward like “Strawberry Pie”. Strawberries, pie crust, done. Others provide a hint of what’s to come, but leave a good deal of mystery on the table. Try, “Meatloaf Surprise.” A mash of ground meat, and…? Is it a good surprise? A bad surprise? I’m not entirely sure I want to find out.

Then there are the recipes that provide no clues, but plenty of intrigue. “Magic Bars” fall firmly into that category, but it’s easy to discern the kitchen wizardry at work after just a quick glance through the instructions. Cookie bars made in minutes, bound together with little more than a can of condensed milk. Consider it the cookie version of the classic dump cake, traditionally lavished with shredded coconut, chopped nuts, and plenty of chocolate. They come together so easily, and satisfy so effortlessly, there really is a certain sort of magic to them.

The real power of any tried-and-true recipe, however, comes from it’s near magical ability to bend to the will of innovation. When cravings led me to pine over every single cookie I could think of, all at once, I thought it would take a miracle to scratch that itch. Turns out it was really just a matter of some sweet sorcery, combined with a pint of So Delicious ice cream.

It takes a great deal of willpower to consciously melt down a perfectly good pint of Snickerdoodle Cashew Ice Cream, but just keep breathing and trust me on this one: The sum will be so much greater than the parts, if you can believe it. The deck is certainly stacked and expectations run high with this cast of characters, complete with sandwich cookies and crunchy chocolate chip cookies, in addition to the traditional graham cracker base. Oh yes, and don’t forget the chocolate morsels or buttery cashew nuts, either.

Designed for the cookie monster that lies at the heart of every child and reasonable adult, these bars can do no wrong, as far as I’m concerned. Melted cashew ice cream serves as the decadent glue that binds this cookie overload together, handily replacing the sticky dairy syrup that is usually embedded in the formula. Best of all, it brings yet another type of cookie into the party, so all told, you’ve got a cookie quartet singing sweetly in every bite- Five if you count the finished bar itself, I suppose.

Keeping with tradition, my title remains appropriately bewitching, providing a subtle taste of what lies ahead, without giving away the ending. The real magic comes with the baking, after all.

It’s my pleasure to join 20 other inspiring bloggers, authors, and general kitchen whizzes in this summer’s Raise a Pint Recipe Contest, made possible by Go Dairy Free and So Delicious. Tasked with finding new ways to make the most of any So Delicious Coconut Milk or Cashew Milk Frozen Desserts, there will no doubt be loads of tempting sweet treats flooding your computer screen soon. All recipes will be unveiled by July 24th, at which point you, my dear readers, will be able to jump in and vote for your favorites, so stay tuned!

Meanwhile, you can also join in on the fun with the #RaiseAPint Event, running until August 5th. So Delicious will reward 20 entrants with ice cream party prize packs. Simply share your moment on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter and be sure to use #RaiseAPint! Find the full details right here, and start scooping.

Cookie Monster Magic Bars

4.5 Ounces (About 1 1/4 Cups) Finely Ground Graham Cracker Crumbs
1/4 Cup Coconut Oil or Vegan Butter, Melted
8 Ounces (About 1/2 Pint ) So Delicious Snickerdoodle Cashew Ice Cream, Melted
6 Ounces (1 Cup) Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
1/2 Cup Chocolate Sandwich Cookies, Roughly Chopped
1/2 Cup Crunchy Mini Chocolate Chip Cookies, Roughly Chopped
1/2 Cup Unsalted Cashews Halves and Pieces

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees and line an 8×8-inch square baking pan with aluminum foil. Lightly grease and set aside.

Combine the graham cracker crumbs and melted coconut oil or vegan butter in small bowl and mix until all the crumbs are thoroughly moistened. Transfer to your prepared pan, and firmly press it across the bottom. If you’re having trouble getting the mixture to cooperate, it helps to lightly grease the bottom of a flat measuring cup and use that to get a nice, smooth layer.

Now comes the fun stuff! Pour the melted ice cream all over the crust, distributing the mix-ins to the best of your ability. Sprinkle the chocolate chips, both types of chopped cookies, and cashews all over. Use your palms to press the goodies down gently but firmly.

Bake for 25 to 30 minutes or until lightly browned. Let cool completely in the pan, and then use the aluminum foil like a sling to remove the whole lot. Slice into bars or squares as desired.

Makes 12 – 16 Bars

Printable Recipe


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Back to the Roots

A flavor that defies all seasons and locations, root beer is nonetheless inextricably linked to memories of my childhood summers, celebrations both big and small in cozy easy coast suburbs. Reserved for grand finales rather than the accompaniment to a meal, this fizzy elixir would rarely arrive at the party alone. Creamy scoops of ice cream always set those bubbles off in perfect contrast, the pale vanilla dollops slowly melting, melding into the dark sea of syrupy sweetness. If you were lucky, it might all be topped off with a swirl of chocolate syrup; just enough to hint at a cocoa undertone, never so much as to steal the show.

Few desserts have shaped my palate quite like that combination, inspiring a wide range of spin-offs over the years, the most “famous” of which can more or less lay claim to landing my first cookbook deal. No matter how many times root beer re-enters my consciousness, in any sort of shape, I will never grow tired of its unique spices, herbal and earthy in all the right ways.

It’s effortless to infuse root beer flavor into absolutely anything, thanks to the magic of baking extracts and concentrates. Armed with this secret ingredient, I’ve set my sights on another adolescent favorite: The classic rice crispy treat.

Not only is the flavor more mature, but the grains themselves are all grown up. There’s still some rice in there for good measure, but it’s kissed with cocoa, adding a greater depth to the whole conversation. Most notably, tiny flecks of crunchy quinoa cereal and popped sorghum round out the affair, lending a distinctive nuttiness not found in the original invention.

That said, you’d be hard-pressed to find a more appealing treat for kids and adults alike. Lacking the fancy cereals, this formula will easily work with all rice crispies just as well. Go ahead and play around with your top breakfast cereals, because as it turns out, just about anything light and crunchy will do. Bathed in a binding mixture of root beer and maple syrup, even the most humble of breakfast fodder can be transformed into an ambrosial sweet snack.

Nostalgia is a strong pull for the overall concept, but the flavor itself will bring you back for more, whether you grew up indulging in root beer floats or not.

Popped Root Beer Crispy Treats

2 Cups Crispy Quinoa Cereal
2 Cups Cocoa Crispy Rice Cereal
1 Cup Popped Sorghum
1 1/2 Teaspoons Refined Coconut Oil*
1/2 Cup Grade B Maple Syrup
6 Tablespoons Granulated Sugar
1/8 Teaspoon Salt
2 Teaspoons Root Beer Extract

*Opt for refined coconut oil to minimize the coconut flavor, or if you’d prefer, simply use your favorite vegan butter instead.

Line an 8 x 8-inch square baking pan with aluminum foil and lightly grease. Combine both cereals and popped sorghum in a large bowl. Set both aside.

Set a medium saucepan over low heat and begin by melting the margarine coconut oil. Once liquefied, add in the maple syrup, sugar, and salt, stirring as needed until the sugar crystals dissolve. Bring the mixture to a steady boil and then cook for an additional 3 – 5 minutes, until it appears to have thickened slightly. Remove from the heat and quickly stir in the root beer extract.

Pour the contents of your saucepan over the dry mix and fold it in carefully but briskly with a wide non-stick spatula, being careful not to crush the cereal.

Pour everything into your prepared pan and gently press it out into an even layer. Let cool completely before cutting into bars.

Makes 10 – 12 Bars

Printable Recipe


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A Cheesecake for the Ages

Now synonymous with New York, the Americanized cheesecake as we know it has only been around for about a century, beginning life a mere shadow of the dense and rich dessert it became. In fact, cheesecake originated sometime around 1500 BCE, from the hands of inventive ancient Greeks and Romans, frequently used as offerings to the gods. This rendition merely combined soft cheese with flour and baked it into submission; pastry bases only emerged sometime in the first century, with sweeteners joining into the mix shortly thereafter. From that point forward, there was no stopping it. Today it might look like the explosion of cupcakes or other trendy food crazes, but of course, without the aid of social media, the cheesecake’s popularity spread at a glacial pace. Eventually reaching the hands of more creative bakers, various cultures developed their own unique approaches, utilizing various cheeses, flours, spices, and eventually, fruits and chocolates. We’ve come a long way, baby.

I’d like to think that the evolution of the cheesecake isn’t yet over. There’s still so much left to explore through the medium of tangy cream cheese perched atop a cookie-like base. In fact, going by that very loose description, why does it need to be a full-fledged cake at all? Can’t we bring it back from the edge of decadence and debauchery, back a bit closer to it’s more humble, less saccharine beginnings? I’m not suggesting we whip up a batch of salty cheese nuggets, but just consider a cheesecake fit for everyday eating, perhaps with a few nutritional benefits to speak of.

I bristle at the overused turn of phrase, but it really is true; you can finally have your cheesecake and eat it, too! Re-imagined for the 21st century, the illustrious dessert has been stripped of all its highfalutin’ frippery and restored back to its original brilliance, suitable for the commoner and the gods alike. Simple squares replace the traditional wedge, making a knife and fork unnecessary for enjoyment. What’s not so plain to see is that underneath the hood, these luscious bars conceal a considerable dose of plant-based protein, furnished by the new Pro(Zero) Natural Strawberry Jam Protein Powder. Simultaneously bolstering the structure of this snack and contributing volumes of fresh, fruity flavor, the powder’s inherent sweetness considerably reduces the need for added sugar. Remarkably flavorful, Pro(Zero) really nailed the flavor of ripe strawberries simmered down into a rich spread, condensed into a satisfying, wholesome package.

Oh, and most importantly of all, did I mention that the finished treats taste amazing? Sure, these brilliant little squares may be a far cry from what the ancient Greeks and Romans had in mind when they first invented the concept, but let’s be honest; they couldn’t even dream up a treat this heavenly, even if it was the food of the gods.

Strawberry Protein Cheesecake Bars

Oatmeal Cookie Crust:

3 Tablespoons Olive Oil
2 Tablespoons Water
1/4 Cup Coconut or Dark Brown Sugar, Firmly Packed
3/4 Cups Quick-Cooking Oats
1/2 Cup White Whole Wheat or All-Purpose Flour
1/4 Teaspoon Ground Ginger
1/4 Teaspoon Salt

Protein-Packed Strawberry Cheesecake Filling:

1 1 12-Ounce Package Extra-Firm Silken Tofu
1 (8-Ounce) Container Vegan Cream Cheese
1/2 Cup Pro(Zero) Natural Strawberry Jam Protein Powder
1/3 Cup + 1/4 Cup Strawberry Jam or Preserves, Divided
2 Tablespoons Lemon Juice
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract

Preheat your oven to 350 degrees and line an 8×8-inch square baking dish with aluminum foil. Lightly grease and set aside.

Whisk together the olive oil, water, and sugar in a medium-sized bowl before adding in the remaining dry ingredients for the crust. Stir well to combine and form a cohesive but slightly crumbly dough. Transfer the mixture into your prepared pans; using lightly moistened hands, press it into the bottom of your pan so that it’s in one even layer. Bake 15 – 18 minutes until lightly browned and let cool.

Meanwhile, prepare the filling by first draining the tofu of any excess water before tossing it into your food processor or blender. Puree thoroughly until completely smooth. Add in the “cream cheese” and pulse to incorporate. Scrape down the sides and blend again, ensuring that no lumps remain before adding the protein powder, 1/3 cup of the strawberry jam, lemon juice, and vanilla. Blend thoroughly until completely smooth and creamy.

Pour the cheesecake filling on top of the par-baked crust, and smooth out the top with your spatula. Tap it gently on the counter a few times to knock out any air bubbles. Take the remaining 1/4 cup of strawberry jam and spoon dollops all over the surface. Use a flat knife or spatula to gently marble and swirl the jam throughout, being careful not to disturb the crust underneath.

Bake for 40 – 45 minutes, until the edges appear set but the center remains ever so slightly wobbly when tapped. It will continue to firm up as it cools.

Let cool completely before moving it into the refrigerator, where it will continue to solidify until it can finally be sliced into bars, after a minimum of 4 hours.

Makes 12 – 16 Bars

Printable Recipe

This post was is sponsored by HPN Supplements, but all content and opinions are entirely my own.


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In the Zone

In this day and age, it’s stunning that there are still any lingering concerns about where vegans get their protein from. That said, not all sources are created equal, and I’m still a big fan of protein shakes for quick nutrition infusions on the go. The field is littered with failed attempts at appealing only to health nuts, and not necessarily their taste buds, so it’s with great trepidation that I would tempt fate and deviate from my tried-and-true rotation of powdered options.

Thank goodness I gave Pro(Zero) by HPN Supplements a try. Blending pea and rice protein with lou han guo and stevia for strength and sweetness, the label itself was unarguably impressive. Immediately dispelling my biggest textural fears, each shake mixed up beautifully in just a standard sports bottle. Silky smooth, not a lump nor clump in sight, it was ready to go with only water and a bit of elbow grease. Quite substantial without any sort of extras necessary, I found that one scoop easily kept me satisfied for hours, even through the most drawn out, late night classes.

Granted, it’s not a miracle mix. It continues to thicken as it sits, so it shouldn’t be blended in advance. Plus, it’s best served icy-cold; at room temperature, there are some vaguely fruity notes, a strained sweetness, and very slightly bitter aftertaste that come to the fore. The takeaway here is that as long as your shakes don’t sit around, you’ll still be sitting pretty!

Excited by this new protein-packed ingredient, I wanted to see what else it could do to supercharge some other snacks. With an eye to the holidays, it seemed like the perfect thing to turn into a festive, yet healthy indulgence.

Does anything say “indulgence” better than a vanilla bean-flecked bark, covered with toasted pistachios and sweetened dried cranberries?

Well, what about a thick slab of chocolate, dotted with crunchy crushed cacao nibs and a smattering of flaky sea salt?

Just because it’s classified as candy doesn’t mean it has to be unhealthy. I’d like to think that protein bark is the new protein bar, with an extra dose of holiday whimsy mixed in. Whether it’s a gift you give to friends and family or simply to yourself, it’s guaranteed to be in good taste!

Not all protein powders react the same when used in various recipes, so I would highly recommend stocking up on Pro(Zero) specifically this time around. Just for you, my sweet readers, order directly from HPN Supplements and get 10% off by using the coupon code “bittersweet”.

Protein Holiday Bark

Peppermint Cacao Bark:

6 Ounces (1 Cup) Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
1/4 Cup Pro(Zero) Natural Whipped Vanilla Protein Powder
1/4 Teaspoon Peppermint Extract
1/4 Cup Cacao Nibs
Coarse or Flaky Sea Salt

Cranberry-Pistachio Bark:

1/2 Cup Refined Coconut Oil
1/2 Cup Pro(Zero) Natural Whipped Vanilla Protein Powder
3 Tablespoons Confectioners’ Sugar
1/4 Teaspoon Vanilla Bean Paste or Powder
1/4 Teaspoon Salt
1/2 Cup Toasted, Unsalted Pistachios
1/2 Cup Dried Cranberries

For the Peppermint Cacao Bark, place the chocolate chips in a microwave-safe dish and heat at 30 second intervals, stirring thoroughly between each cycle, until completely melted. Add in the protein powder and peppermint extract, mixing thoroughly. Once the powder is completely incorporated, spread the mixture out on a piece of parchment paper or a silpat. Smooth it out as thinly as possible with a wide spatula; exact dimensions aren’t important.

Sprinkle the cacao nibs and a pinch of sea salt over the top, gently pressing the goodies into the surface so that they adhere. Place in the fridge for at least 20 minutes for the bark to solidify before breaking into pieces and enjoying.

For the Cranberry-Pistachio Bark, place the coconut oil in a microwave-safe dish and heat until liquefied. Add in the protein powder, confectioner’s sugar, vanilla paste or powder, and salt, stirring until the mixture is homogeneous. Allow it to sit in a cool place for about 15 minutes, stirring periodically, until it begins to thicken and solidify again. If you house is very warm, place it in the fridge for only 5 – 10 minutes, stirring every minute or so for the same effect.

Spread the mixture out on a piece of parchment paper or a silpat as thinly as possible with a wide spatula; exact dimensions aren’t important. Once smooth, sprinkle the pistachios and cranberries evenly over the top, gently pressing the goodies into the surface so that they adhere. Place in the fridge for at least 20 minutes for the bark to solidify before breaking into pieces and enjoying.

Store either rendition in an airtight container in the fridge or a cool place for up to a week.

Printable Recipe

This post was is sponsored by HPN Supplements, but all content and opinions are entirely my own.


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Ode to Soy

Pulp. By-product. Waste.

To describe the venerable soybean substance known as okara by any of the above terms strikes me as ranging from unpleasant to downright offensive. Though in truth, no one has ever set out specifically to create okara, it’s a shame that such a vital component of the whole bean is often cast aside, still brimming with unrealized nutritional and culinary potential.

If you want to make soymilk or tofu, you’ve got to blend some beans, and what’s leftover after straining out the liquid is fresh okara. Still packed with impressive amounts of fiber, protein, and calcium, it’s stunning that the stuff hasn’t spawned a new superfood craze of its own. Pitifully hard to come by on grocery store shelves, some metropolitan areas might boast Asian markets savvy enough to carry this uncelebrated soybean substance, but manufacturers are more than happy to help with direct requests.

I was lucky enough to take away a heaping helping from my visit to Hodo Soy and have only just begun to explore the limitless recipe possibilities. It freezes beautifully and has a mild flavor that can agree with just about any dish. One of my favorite simple preparations is Bryanna Clark Grogan’s okara parmesan, but with the new abundance on hand, I wanted to explore farther beyond the typical okara preparations.

Protein bars are always in high demand; a perfect snack or light meal on the go, their only fault can be excessive sweetness or secretly lack-luster ingredients. Not so of homemade renditions, and this okara-based beauty turns the standard format on its head. Based almost entirely on soybeans in a number of different forms and gluten-free to boot, it’s a delicious change of pace that won’t leave you in a sugar coma soon after indulging.

The following recipe calls for dry okara, such as you would find resulting from commercial production. Okara borne of homemade tofu is generally wetter simply because home cooks don’t have fancy machines designed specifically for squeezing every last drop of moisture out of the pulp. Not to worry; just plan on baking the wet okara on the lowest temperature possible for a little bit longer before moving on to the toasting phase.

Super Soy Okara Bars

1/2 Cup Creamy Soynut Butter
1/2 Cup Light Agave Nectar
2 Cups Toasted Okara*
1/3 Cup Roasted Edamame
2 Tablespoons Toasted Black Sesame Seeds
2 Tablespoons All-Purpose Gluten-Free Flour
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract
1/2 Teaspoon Salt

*To toast your okara, preheat the oven to 300 degrees. Start with at least 3 cups of dry okara to ensure there will be enough for this recipe, and spread it out in a large baking pan to a thickness of no more than 1/2 inch. Cook for 1 – 1 1/2 hours, stirring every 15 – 25 minutes, until lightly golden all over and smelling wonderfully nutty. Cool completely before using or storing in an airtight container in the refrigerator for up to two weeks

After toasting the okara, raise the oven temperature to 350 degrees. Line an 8×8-inch baking pan with parchment paper or aluminum foil. Lightly grease and set aside.

From here on in, the procedure is very simple. Place all of the ingredients in a large bowl and mix well with a sturdy spatula. Stir until the batter is smooth (aside from the mix-ins, of course) and don’t be afraid to really have at it. There’s no gluten to worry about it, so keep mixing until everything is fully blended.

Transfer the batter into your prepared prepared pan, spreading it out to fill the space evenly and smoothing the top.

Bake 15 – 20 minutes or until golden brown and surface feel dry. Let the bars cool completely in the pan before using the parchment or foil as a sling to lift the whole lot out. Slice into single servings and wrap with plastic for later enjoyment. Store in an air-tight container in the fridge for up to a week to maintain maximum freshness.

Makes 8 – 12 Bars

Printable Recipe


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A Baker’s Fairytale

Once upon a time, in a kitchen far away, there lived a little baker. Day in and day out, the little baker would fire up the oven and punch out dough after dough, fearlessly conquering scores of wild yeasts within. All the villagers depended on the little baker to slay these fickle beasts, feeding the town and keeping it safe all in one deft thrust of the rolling pin. Years of practice rewarded the little baker with flawless, lofty loaves, perfectly soft and tender through every slice, until one fateful day when a stack of sad, half-eaten toast arrived at her doorstep along with a hastily scribbled note. Scrawled out in the uncertain, tilting print of a child, it read:

Go back to the old formula! We hate this new stuff. It tastes like wet cardboard and it’s so bad, even the jam slides right off in protest. Did you switch to GMO flour? Is it gluten-free? Whatever you’re doing differently, stop it!

The little baker was perplexed. The formula was the same as ever, simple but reliable, exactly as it had been when she first learned to tame the wild yeasts years ago. Perhaps it was the little baker that had changed. Growing weary after just the first few loaves, it became a struggle to keep the oven light on late into the night, as the wild yeasts grew restless and unruly. Slowly, almost imperceptibly at first, they were beating down the little baker’s spirit, draining her of all the magic it took to transform humble dough into delicious bread.

Crestfallen, the little baker mournfully shoveled the cold, abandoned toast into her mouth while whipping through every cabinet in the kitchen. Surely, there was a secret ingredient in here that could turn things around. The villagers all depended on her! Alas, nothing turned up; just the standard salt, sugar, and flour that had always been there remained in amply supply, and nothing more. The little baker retreated to her bed, falling heavily onto her pillow and immediately drifting into a strange dreamland…

Everywhere around the little baker, the air glittered with rainbow colors. What is this strange sorcery?, she wondered to no one in particular. It seemed to fill the entire room, invading her very pores, becoming a part of her. The little baker’s hands began to glow with a peculiar warmth, as though they were on fire.

The little baker woke with a start, panicked that morning had already broken and the daily bread still needed to be made. Had she gotten drunk on over-fermented yeast in that toast? No matter, there was a job to do, even if the magic was gone.

When the little baker stepped into the kitchen, she couldn’t believe her eyes. Sitting there on the counter, still slightly warm, was a golden brown loaf of bread. Surely, she would have remembered baking such a beautiful specimen, but the little baker was certain she went straight to sleep last night. It looked fairly humble, and yet there was definitely a different energy about it. The loaf hummed with potential.

Tentatively, the little baker wielded her sword-like bread knife and plunged it into the heart of this suspicious beast. As the first slice fell away, she gasped.

Swirled throughout the standard crumb, a rainbow of fairy dust had embedded itself into the loaf. Without missing a beat or stopping to lavish the bread with any sort of accouterments, the little baker hungrily devoured the first wedge in record time. Impossibly light yet satisfyingly chewy at the same time, it was a world apart from the sad, standard loaves she had churned out just the day prior. Sweet and slightly sticky in all the right ways, the fairy dust within didn’t taste of a rainbow, but it possessed an undeniably enchanting power, elevating the unremarkable baked good into something positively spellbinding. How it happened, where it came from- The little baker hadn’t the slightest clue, but it filled her with a new, indefatigable zest, impassioned once more to reproduce this miracle.

Even though the little baker never did discover the source of the fairy dust, nor create another loaf quite so otherworldly, her breads once more began to rise to the occasion; filled not with magic, but simply the little baker’s passion, the bread never tasted better.

(This loaf was inspired by fairy toast, and created in celebration of the 10th annual World Bread Day.)

World Bread Day 2015 (October 16)

Fairy Swirl Bread

1 Cup Unsweetened Non-Dairy Milk
1/3 Cup Granulated Sugar
2 Teaspoons Active Dry Yeast
3 Tablespoons Olive Oil
1 Teaspoon Vanilla Extract
1 Tablespoon Vital Wheat Gluten
3/4 Teaspoon Salt
3 – 3 1/2 Cups All-Purpose Flour

1/2 Cup Rainbow Sprinkles

In a small saucepan, combine the non-dairy milk and sugar over medium heat. Warm the mixture gently, bringing the temperature up no higher than 110 degrees; exceed that, and the poor yeast will all be killed instantly. Aim for around 100 degrees or just warm to the touch, turn off the heat, and sprinkle the yeast on top. Let it sit and become bubbly; about 5 minutes.

Pour the yeast mixture into your stand mixer with the dough hook installed, and introduce the oil and vanilla as well. Add in the wheat gluten, salt, and 3 cups of the flour. Start the mixer on low speed to combine, allowing a few minutes for the dough to begin coming together. If it seems excessively wet, go ahead and add the remaining flour, 1/4 cup at a time, until it mostly pulls off the sides of the bowl and feels tacky but not sticky. Let the dough hook knead it for about 10 minutes before scraping it out, kneading it briefly by hand, and shaping it into a smooth, elastic ball. Drop the ball of dough into a lightly greased bowl, cover, and let it rise for about two hours in a warm place.

The dough should more than double in volume, at which point you’re ready to punch it down and shape it. Lightly flour a clean surface and turn the dough out onto it. Either use your hands or a rolling pin to press it out into a rectangle. The most important dimension to keep in mind is the width, so that the final loaf fits comfortably inside the pan. Keep it around 8 – 8 1/2 inches on two sides, but roll it out as long and thin as possible. You may want to let the dough rest and relax periodically to stretch it even further. The longer you can make the dough, the more impressive the final swirl will be.

Scatter the sprinkles evenly over the entire surface of the dough except for an inch of one of the shorter sides. Starting at the fully sprinkled end, roll it up as if you were making cinnamon buns and pinch the finishing edge closed. Lightly grease an 8 1/2 x 4 1/2 loaf pan, and drop the rolled dough into it, seam side down. Cover and let rise again, for about an hour, or until the loaf is almost peeking out above the rim of the pan.

Preheat your oven to 375 degrees. Once the loaf is risen and ready, tent very loosely with foil and bake for 20 minutes. Carefully remove the foil at this point, drop the temperature down to 350 degrees, and bake for a final 5 – 10 minutes, until golden brown all over. Let it rest in the pan for 10 – 15 minutes before transferring it to a wire rack. Cool completely before you even think about slicing it, no matter how incredible it smells. Trust me, your slices will be much more fluffy (and less smeared with molten sprinkle filling) with just a little bit of patience!

Makes 1 Loaf

Printable Recipe


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Silent Sunday: Sweet on Austin

Zombie Sundae (with Chocolate-Chai and Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream) from Sweet Ritual

Austin Cream Pie Donut from Red Rabbit Cooperative Bakery

Mint Chocolate Chip Ice Cream Sandwich (with Chocolate Chip Cookies) from Moojo

Currant Scone and Iced Chai Tea from The Steeping Room

Chocolate-Dipped, Coconut-Covered Frozen Banana from Bananarchy

Birthday Cake Cupcake (Strawberry Cake with Almond Whipped Topping) from Sugar Mama’s Bakeshop

Nada Moo Vanilla Chai Sundae, Ice Cream Social Hosted by Counter Culture

Chocolate, Carrot, Lemon, Coconut, Cookie Dough, and Mint Chocolate Chip Cupcakes from Sugar Circus

Dreamsicle Cupcake from Capital City Bakery