Unholy Guacamole

Don’t judge a book by its cover, a person by their clothing, or a dip by its color. The comparison is inevitable so I’ll go ahead and say it: The following recipe, no matter how brilliantly described or lovingly plated, will always and forever look like a glorious mountain of cow plop, steaming away on a hot summer’s afternoon.

Just avert your eyes and dig in. The smoky, spicy, earthy flavor of cocoa mole awaits your taste buds if you can suspend disbelief. Presenting a bold alternative to the ubiquitous green guacamole filling bowls across the country for Super Bowl festivities, it won’t score any points for presentation, but may just win the snacking game.

Yield: 2 Cups

GuacaMole

GuacaMole

When guacamole meets mole, the results may not be pretty, but the flavor is out of this word. This creamy, smoky, spicy, and earthy mashup will tempt you to double (or triple) dip.

Prep Time 10 minutes
Total Time 10 minutes

Ingredients

  • 2 Tablespoons Unsweetened Cocoa Powder
  • 1 Teaspoon Ground Cumin
  • 1 Teaspoon Chipotle Powder
  • 1/4 Teaspoon Ground Nutmeg
  • 1/4 Teaspoon Ground Cinnamon
  • 1/4 Teaspoon Ground Cloves
  • 1/4 Teaspoon Salt
  • 1/8 Teaspoon Ground White pepper
  • 2 Avocados
  • 2 Tablespoons Lime Juice
  • 1 Small Heirloom or Medium Roma Tomato, Chopped
  • 2 Cloves Garlic, Finely Minced
  • 2 Tbsp Fresh Cilantro, Minced
  • 2 Scallions, Thinly Sliced

Instructions

  1. Combine the cocoa, spices, and salt in a medium bowl and mix well.
  2. Pit, dice and scoop the avocado flesh out, adding it to the bowl along with the lime juice. Very roughly mash with a fork, incorporating all of the dry ingredients but keeping the texture rather chunky.
  3. Mix in the tomato, garlic, cilantro, and scallions last, stirring until the vegetables and herbs are equally distributed throughout the dip.
  4. Serve with chips or cut vegetable crudites.

Notes

Enjoy right away or store in an airtight container in the fridge for up to two days.

Nutrition Information:

Yield:

8

Serving Size:

1/4 cup

Amount Per Serving: Calories: 68Total Fat: 6gSaturated Fat: 1gTrans Fat: 0gUnsaturated Fat: 4gCholesterol: 0mgSodium: 71mgCarbohydrates: 5gFiber: 3gSugar: 0gProtein: 1g

Instant Ice Cream Gratification

The only thing worse than suffering through a sweltering hot summer day without air conditioning is trying to survive those same conditions without any ice cream in the house. It’s entirely possible that one can make do without such convenient modern amenities that would help abate the heat, but only if generous amounts of frozen, creamy treats are kept close at hand. Ice cream makes even chilly days more bearable, so going without a single tub of the cool confection is tantamount to criminal insanity. For those with limited equipment and limited patience, there have been few solutions to this conundrum outside of an impromptu grocery trip. Thankfully, non-dairy alternatives are no longer the anomaly in mainstream markets, although homemade ice cream will still beat out anything prepackaged any day of the week.

This recipe today goes out to all those ice cream fiends without ice cream machines. Plenty of low-tech methods exist for fabricating frozen treats without fancy machinery, but let’s be honest: Few people, myself included, care to fuss with scraping ice crystals or tossing around a plastic bag of ice cubes all day, just for a few bites of sweet satisfaction.

Your icy irritation ends here. All you need is a freezer, four ingredients, and an appetite. I would wager that you’ve already got two out of three already covered.

The ingenious CocoWhip by So Delicious is the secret ingredient that makes this sweet act of alchemy possible. Providing light, scoopable structure without any further agitation, the same results can also be achieved with good old whipped coconut cream, but starting with a ready-whipped and exceptionally stable base makes the process infinitely easier.

As luck would have it, So Delicious recently launched their Snackable Recipe Contest, so it would have been crazy for me to hold onto this treat any longer. Besides, as much as I love cooking, summer is meant to be enjoyed, not spent in the kitchen. Whip up this effortless ice cream base and go play; you’ll have a delicious dessert waiting for you when you return.

No-Churn Vanilla Bean Ice Cream

2/3 Cup Vanilla Coconut Creamer
1/3 Cup Light Agave Nectar
1 1/2 Teaspoons Vanilla Bean Paste or Extract
1 9-Ounce Package Cocowhip

In a large bowl, stir together the creamer, agave, and vanilla. Add in one small scoop of the Cocowhip, stirring to incorporate and begin to lighten the mixture. Introduce half of the remaining Cocowhip, folding it carefully into the liquid, keeping the airy structure as intact as possible. Repeat with the last portion of Cocowhip, leaving a few streaks in the mixture if need be; it’s better to under-mix than over-mix.

Pour the ice cream base into a loaf pan or air-tight container and carefully move it into your freezer. Allow it to sit, undisturbed, for at least 6 hours before serving.

Printable Recipe

Chip Off the Old Block

While I tend to focus my cooking efforts on sweets, I do certainly appreciate the salty spectrum of the snacking kingdom as well. In attempts to please both my own and my sister’s tastes, I chose fairly basic but widely agreeable materials to experiment with. Pitas, garlic, salt – What’s not to love?

Feeling relatively confident in the munchablility of my chips, I whipped up a fairly large batch Saturday afternoon and carefully packed them away into a large Tupperware container. The very next morning, when I went riffling through the kitchen cabinets in search of a decent breakfast cereal, I discovered my container of chips… Nearly half empty! Was there a black hole in this used plastic Chinese food receptacle?!

Still befuddled, I looked over to the nearby counter to discover the following note: “Hannah – Your crackers are the best. EVER. Massive Success.” I was so thrilled to learn that I had somehow fed my picky sibling, I’m not exaggerating in the least! And there were also numerous underlines to emphasize the “ever” part.

The technique is so brainless, I could make chips in my sleep. Or perhaps like my sister, just eat a whole gallon of them. I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to buy commercial snack foods again knowing I have such a fool-proof recipe in my arsenal!

Yield: Makes 6 Servings

Garlic Pita Chips

Garlic Pita Chips

Fool-proof, crunchy,pita chips are mere minutes away! This simple formula is a great way to use up leftover flatbread before it goes stale.

Prep Time 5 minutes
Cook Time 8 minutes
Total Time 13 minutes

Ingredients

  • 6 Medium Pitas
  • 3 Tablespoon Olive Oil
  • 6 – 8 Cloves Garlic, Finely Minced
  • 1 Teaspoon Dried Thyme
  • 1/4 - 3/4 Teaspoon Salt

Instructions

  1. Preheat your oven to 375 degrees. Begin by slicing your pita pockets along the circumference, so that you have 2 slices of bread. Cut these circles into 8 even wedges across the center like a pizza. It’s not vital to have them all the exact same size, but it’s best to get them fairly close so that none burn when you cook them.
  2. Toss the pita wedges into a large bowl with the oil, garlic, thyme, and salt and toss until your pitas are nicely coated. You could of course increase or reduce any of the seasonings, or change them up altogether. Rosemary is a common accompaniment to garlic, I’m just not a huge fan so I decided to try something different. Get crazy, play around with stuff and make it your own!
  3. Spread all of the pieces onto one layer on a baking sheet. Toss them into the oven for 5 – 8 minutes, but don’t walk away until they’re completely done toasting and safely out of the heat. It takes only an extra minute to turn your lovely snacks into smoldering piles of ash. It took me 7 minutes to get them perfectly crisped, but everyone’s oven is different.
  4. Allow your chips to cool, and store in an airtight container. Munch away! (I highly suggest dipping them in garlic hummus – So good! Just make sure you don’t go on a date afterwards, or have them eat some too! Garlic is the stuff of love anyways.)

Nutrition Information:

Yield:

6

Serving Size:

1

Amount Per Serving: Calories: 231Total Fat: 7gSaturated Fat: 1gTrans Fat: 0gUnsaturated Fat: 6gCholesterol: 0mgSodium: 3985mgCarbohydrates: 35gFiber: 1gSugar: 1gProtein: 6g

All nutritional information presented within this site are intended for informational purposes only. I am not a certified nutritionist and any nutritional information on BitterSweetBlog.com should only be used as a general guideline. This information is provided as a courtesy and there is no guarantee that the information will be completely accurate. Even though I try to provide accurate nutritional information to the best of my ability, these figures should still be considered estimates.